SFA chiefs are set to launch an urgent probe after a mass outbreak of football marred yesterday’s Old Firm game.

On a day that shamed the reputation of this age-old fixture, a shocked world looked on as:

• Spectacular long-range shots were fired into the net;

• A torrent of passes went straight to their intended target;

  A full house of 50,000 fans were subjected to what can only be described as relentless entertainment.

   

  Police and stewards have come in for criticism over their decision to stand by and let these two teams away with recklessly causing enjoyment that was seen by millions live on TV.And Hampden insiders say they believe the scenes that unfolded inside Ibrox may have been planned in advance.One said: “We have received intelligence that ringleaders – known as ‘managers’ – set out quite deliberately to have a proper game of football here.”Our sources say that they had drilled their players to try and score more goals than the opposition.”Some of these players may not even be local, but were specially imported for their ruthless ability to kick a ball in a straight line.”We know this may all be hard for some to believe, but these are the sophisticated lengths people will go to in a bid to ruin such historic occasions as these.”It may even be that both gangs were in on a pre-arranged signal that would spark this so-called ‘football’ – perhaps a whistle or suchlike.”I am confident the Association WILL get to the bottom of these worrying events.”

  Brave words.

  But after 90 minutes when the Old Firm’s reputation soared to unwanted new highs, you were left wondering what power the beaks will have to do a damn thing.Because make no mistake, if this kind of game between Rangers and Celtic catches on, if this so- called ‘entertainment’ is allowed to take a grip – well, it’s the end of their way of life as we know it.I for one have been covering these games for close on 30 years and rarely remember having been so exhilarated.At one point, I looked around me and saw a little boy in a Rangers top. He was smiling.Hell mend the grown-ups who did this to him.As the goals flew in and chance after chance was created, there were even a few minutes when I didn’t notice the sectarian chanting and the vicious obscenities raining down from all corners.Yet it had all started as a typical, rotten-to-the-core, bile-coated derby; the pre-match songs typically nasty, the tension as un-nerving as ever.Then – just as the crowd inside the stadium and legions more in bars and in armchairs settled down to endure the usual kick-and-rush, hate-filled nonsense – it all went horribly right.Young home midfielder Jamie Ness took hold of a half-cleared corner and produced a gorgeous, bending drive that left keeper Fraser Forster motionless as it arced into the net.Poor kid. He wasn’t to know the enjoyment he had just unleashed. Because from then on… well, what adjectives are there? Terrific? Breathtaking? Thrill-a-minute?

   

  Somehow, none seem nearly adequate.Of course, it’s unfair to tar everyone out on that pitch with the same brush.There there were some who tried in vain to maintain the standards we’ve come to expect from the Old Firm.Stevie Naismith could have been sent off for an early lunge at Mark Wilson, then made up for it late on by diving to try and win a penalty.Celtic keeper Forster also proved there WAS still room for an old-fashioned rush of blood among the clinical heads around him as he took out Naisy to gift a penalty.Traditionalists had the occasional late tackle, elbow and flurry of handbags to cling on to as they saw all they believe in fall apart before their disbelieving eyes.But let’s be honest here. When even a seasoned maniac like El Hadji Diouf is dragged up to the level of putting skill before stupidity, the game’s well and truly knackered.With his standing in the game, we had every right to expect less from Diouf. We were banking on anything from a square go with the ref to diving headfirst into the Celtic end and being torn to little pieces like a scene from Shaun of the Dead.Seeing him refuse to stick the head in when Hoops skipper Scott Brown went nose-to-nose with him after making it 2-2, though, you wondered what the hell these games are coming to.And the truly worrying thing about it all? That the end result leaves us with yet ANOTHER showdown between these two which could easily degenerate into the same level of sport.Celtic’s players will not forget the quality of Ness’ goal and may well try to emulate it.Rangers will watch the footage of Celtic’s full-backs rampaging forward and could easily attempt to have theirs do the same.It doesn’t bear thinking about, it really doesn’t.There are four more Old Firm games between now and May, All we can hope is that before the next one – in the league at Parkhead on February 20 – a whole lot of men who should know a whole lot better will come to their senses and get it all wrong.This fixture is meant to be about sloppiness.It’s supposed to be about about hoofing the ball into Row Z.Its strength is in the late tackles and the melees being what define the whole shooting match, not being mere side-issues to this sinister ‘entertainment’ business.Most of all, it’s about the headlines being made by what nonsense both sets of fans get up, not some attention-seeking ‘footballer’ producing a superb goal or a defence-splitting pass.These two clubs have less than two weeks to dirty up their act and restore this fixture’s rightful place in the gutter.So the message to Walter Smith and Neil Lennon this morning is a stark one – RESTART THE MADNESS NOW.